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Queer vegan cryptid trying their best to survive late-stage capitalism while helping others do the same.
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How I’ve Lived

Before I was born, this was the situation: my mom, my dad, my dad’s mother, and my dad’s grandfather lived in what was left of a small house in rural north-central Florida. The total usable area was about 800 square feet, or about the size of the one-bedroom apartment I now share with my partner.

It’s hardly enough room for the two of us, let alone for four people. And yet my parents decided to have children. My mom miscarried before she had me, and I was planned. I think my brother was more of an oops. But it hardly…

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Medical History

My mom, Barbara, had been ill for a very, very long time. She had an amazing work ethic, and she valued that about herself. I admired it about her, and I emulated it.

It was a necessary thing, and it is for many people. She was diagnosed with rectal cancer in 2006, at age 41, and about 11 years later, she was diagnosed with metastatic lung cancer. She died on June 21, 2017. It was the summer solstice, the longest day of the year, because of course it was.

Her quality of life had been pretty piss-poor for a long…

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While these are not the only talks that have changed my worldview, they are talks I see as being incredibly noteworthy in one way or another. Therefore, I feel a strong desire to share them with others. Please enjoy!

How electroshock therapy changed me

Speaker: Sherwin Nuland
Tags: Medicine, Psychiatry, Mental health, Depression
Why it matters: As someone who has been on 30+ medications for mental illness since age 18, I’ve been disappointed in a variety of unexpected ways by traditional medicine. Disappointed, not defeated, though; I’ve continually had the sense that it could be done better. I’m not against taking medication, and I do so…

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It takes jumping through countless hoops to get treatment for chronic pain, and I had one psychiatric nurse practitioner tell me I couldn’t possibly have ADHD because I held a four-year degree and was in grad school at age 22. No Adderall or Percocet or Modafinil or B-12 injections, not even testosterone or a few days’ supply of Ambien, but weight loss drugs? No problem.

One of my favorite TED talks is by a guy named Russ Altman. …

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The paradox of freedom and safety is that you can never have both perfect freedom and perfect safety at the same time. In order to be protected, some amount of freedom must be lost in the bargain. In order to be fully free, you have to take responsibility for protecting yourself.

You can protect yourself from COVID-19 by wearing a mask and getting vaccinated. Or you can prioritize freedom, choosing to flex by refusing to wear a mask or get the shots, leaving yourself open to serious health complications, should you become infected.

But the two options are not morally…

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Most people want to improve themselves in some way. Whether it’s mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, or otherwise, there is a very human-y thing in us that asks the question, “What next?”

It can drive us to consume, to always want the next, newest, shiniest toys and gadgets. A lot of people do this almost blindly. I certainly can relate to that. (I’ve been wanting a Nintendo Switch for ages, although I probably won’t get one anytime soon. It is what it is. But I digress.) We can also harness it to improve ourselves and help others do the same.


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00. Preamble

I did receive the first two economic impact payments, abbreviated EIP1 and EIP2, so I know that the infrastructure is there, so to speak. My monthly payouts from Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) and Supplemental Security Income (SSI) each include “TREAS” in their description, so I know these agencies are routinely able to process things. I can further gather from this that my bank is able to receive those payments from those agencies.

Bipolar disorder, PTSD, and more than a decade of eating disorder shenanigans have wrecked a lot of me, but I’m not dead yet. I’m working toward getting…

[Warning: contains medical kerfufflery and a lot of talk about death and dying, in case that wasn’t clear.]

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It may be a controversial opinion, but I truly am in favor of assisted suicide under certain circumstances. If the person knows that their illness has no effective treatment, or that the treatment is likely to greatly diminish their quality of life, they may choose to avoid treatment altogether.

If they are able to give informed consent, they should be allowed to choose to die. By that, I mean they should be given the option alongside the menu of other traditional choices…

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The first thing you have to understand about my mom is that she needed an advocate by her side, and the first thing you have to know about me is that I didn’t trust anyone else to do it.

Years ago, that might not have been possible. But there seems to have been a shift in the medical field, and people are realizing more and more that involving a patient’s family in the care process has benefits for everyone at the table, including the patient. In this case, it mattered more than most, because my mother had been admitted to…

This is a story in three parts. It chronicles three times when I had physical symptoms that led to surprising, real-world revelations in my little universe of one.

Is intuition something you’re born with? Can it be trained? Can anyone train up their intuition, or are certain people better attuned to whatever it is that makes intuition possible?

Because it’s true: intuition is entirely possible. I’m not talking about predicting the future with any real specificity, at least for me. I’m referring to something more general. The only real problem is that I don’t have control over much of it.

London Graves

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